The biggest issue that so many people have is they talk about things in theory versus reality. If you just listen to this company, I'm doing this for everyone here like what are you gonna do like you just you know which is amazing. like you're coming from a good place, you'd like this for them but like I Just also don't think you have an answer to the shortcut so you have no other choice I think we should go to the audience now. Uh so we have a few microphones at the front of the room give a question for Gary We're gonna ask you to do is line up behind one of these microphones and Gary will choose you based on who's in the lines I Highly recommend you get your ass in line.

Let's get going my friend. I'm well four years ago I stood here in front of you 2019 and you spoke to the whole room and said if you're not on tick tock you're killing yourself. You're killing your business and that night I went home, made my first video and an 80 year old boy said to me in the comments never do that again I exit for one year on Tick Tock and a couple of years later um I had half a million followers I didn't always look like this um so I created a mascotic character on Tick Tock um I'll listen to everything you said and during that time I created a business as well um I've knocked every door I I Who's there listened to me I went to the shelves to like stock my products I did everything which you asked me to do. took the nose, took the nose, took the nose, didn't let me get down I got there in the end.

but then also I realized that you said to me in that 2000 meeting 2019 that people are trying to be 3-0 Uh, there will be a lot of wrong decisions you'll make and I did make a lot of wrong decisions because my first product didn't go very well but we are created it I made the second product which I'm selling since since um January 2000 this year 2023. So I just want to know. Even though I I understand that there's not gonna be three and zero, it's always going to be wrong decisions, right decisions. When do you know that you give up? When do you know that it's not working? When When does the ambition and ability become confused? When do you know that you go back to what you were good at which is social media? Yeah, um and the second part of that question is if you think, well, sorry The second part is like how do you position yourself in the market Well on the first one, you know by the results.

if if you go for a long period of time and people are not buying your product, your product is wrong. So this is the thing the product is selling. but when I'm selling it. Okay so I've been to so many investors.

Um I've been on a couple of TV shows as well which will be airing later this year. So I don't talk much about it. The investors have told me that the product is not scalable because the product price is quite High the product quality is good. I've since January 2023 I've sold 10 000 units just doing farmers markets over the weekends.

Okay, so the product sells when I sell it when people know what it is. but on its own. Do they do? They do they issue. Do they repeat? Buy from you? Yes.

Absolutely. So haven't you actually won? Yes, But I want to have the mass the scale. Why? Because that's what my dream is. Why? Um, because I want to leave a legacy for who or my child.

Okay, but why are you defining that on math? Um, probably because that's one of the dreams I always had since being a child. That I want to build a company which everybody should know about. Well, then you should adjust what you're doing. You're talking out of both sides of your mouth.

Clear that it doesn't scale in its current form, right? You just said you want to do a mass, but you're telling me. But it sells when I sell it. but that's inherently not scalable. So which is it? Um I want to scale so I want to bring down the costs.

So bring down the costs. Okay, well, this is the this is the thing. I can only bring down the cost by reducing the quality of the product I Understand, but you just told me the number one Kpi is scale. Maybe it's nothing.

See, see, that's the difference. That's the difference. Um, you know what I mean Yes, that's like I'm gonna move on because we took a lot of time on this. That what I did for you is why I did it that way and why I stuck with it is I wanted everybody to hear that you can't have both if both can't coexist if he's talking I want scale? That's the most important thing that's this.

Legacy Well then you can't have a subjective opinion on quality is a McDonald's burger quality. The bottom line is the person that's eating it gets to decide not me, not you. But they hit scale. Scale is not debatable, quality is debatable, and last thing in 2019 I wanted to give him a food product.

it was not ready but now it is I'll take it brother. Thank you Hi Gary Thanks so much for your um, generosity or my daily podcast every morning. Thank you. What's your name? Fatima Um I set up a management consulting company um after being bullied in corporate okay, whilst suffering from a anxiety disorder.

Okay, I've grown up to seven figures organically predominantly through. Linkedin Wow, Um, my question is because I'm in a male dominated industry and I know you're not a male, but you probably work with successful women. How can I be disruptive so that I can gain the attention of the companies that are constantly bringing in the mail Consulting Companies you know typical middle-aged white hair. Um, as opposed to people like me that are female-led entrepreneurs.

You've already succeeded though. You're doing seven figures Yes, but I feel like I've sort of stalled like there's so much more I've got plans to do and want to do. um and I'm just kind of like not sure what the next step is. Yeah, I mean I think you're also very young in your journey like those old white males a lot of times.

It's not because they're white males, it's because they've been doing it for 30 years and a lot of people buy experience like I mean if you've been able to scale to seven figures, you just gotta keep doing it. You know what? I mean you're not going to convince anybody? Yeah, Yes, you're definitely not going to convince them on the thesis of you. Why are you picking these guys over me? Yes, that's not a compelling argument. You say not to try to convince people, but have conviction I mean I just feel like a lot of time.

What I'm worried about is you're making an ideological framework for yourself. like I'm gonna show them like they're not. You know what I mean Yes, like even the way you said white male, older white male means that you have disdain towards it which I think is actually a vulnerability. Yeah, good point.

You know what I mean like there's um I know unlimited female black Asian like there's there's people win in all shapes and sizes. Of course there's discrimination. Of course there's bias. Of course there's ways to go on getting Equity to where we want.

None of that is stopping your business. so don't focus on that thing. Bingo Thank you. You got it.

Okay, okay here. Okay what's your name? Erica Eric Erica but I live in Melbourne um so I found you in 2017 when I was I had my second baby I was breastfeeding I had my electricity on the payment plan. was looking for coins to buy bread I wasn't like America broke because I'm from America yep but in Australia we were broke yep and I kept. You know because y'all we have a good here.

Come on. Okay so I was listening I was watching your YouTubes and I found crushing it and I heard you kind of give a loving slap of like who cares about your story no one's coming to find you. You got to get out there and build it and I started I like quit my job and my husband was freaking out. He had no money but I'm like it like it's here I gotta do this and I wouldn't be here where I am if it wasn't for you uh that first year of my business I did my anchor podcast like I don't know what I was doing in my car my Hoops were hitting the Apple headphones, the E-tag was going off and beeping and because we'd have money and that podcast has like 2.6 going down lows now because of you.

So thank you. You know, um, it's wild. Um so I did all that and now we are where we want to be and we're and we're We're about impact and I want to help millions of women and I hear you always say if you want to help Millions act like it with how you show up your content. all that I got Nina my social media ballerina over there shout out to you it's two of us trying to do you know the content and I love it I would do it underwater asleep talking in my sleep I love this but how do we I guess scale on socials and not I Got two young kids and I want to like watch them grow up.

of course you like 24 7 and I love talking to people in the DMS yep like how do we do that with a very small team about wanting to kind of be everywhere because we want to reach maximum people by by YouTube getting better at that by by YouTube being better at the content. Okay, let me explain what I mean by that. We are living in the craziest era of social since I've started talking about this in 2006. people in here could not even have an account and tomorrow make a video that gets more views than both of us combined have ever gotten on the Merit of the content.

The way you can get bigger is by being better at the content. Do you understand what to do in the first three seconds of a tick tock? Do you understand the titling? Do you understand what time to be posting? Do you like this is a craft? There's a there's there's a craft to being better at the content. So I think you've got the personality that can get you to a certain level? Yeah. But if you're asking me a direct question of how do we get better, you get better by understanding.

Moments of opportunity, a new platform pops out. Which is why four years ago I was here saying tick tock tick tock tick tock because I knew what was happening there. But then when it gets mature and it's not that easy, you have to be better at the craft. I Don't know how much time the two of you are spending on Re: No, no, no I'm really understanding how the algorithms work on understanding why a carousel ad will do this.

Yeah, how you know how much are you posting on LinkedIn Okay, yep I'm posting on LinkedIn right? Yeah, So at what time? Yeah, how many words? what? quality over like a load of posts both because we're not putting out like it's not just to do it like we're trying to put good, but it's a million platforms now because you know sometimes you're like post 50 times a day and it's like I do have that with so we have one. but what is shipping decided on the results or your subjective opinion of you grading your own homework? Yeah yeah. like nobody thinks their kids ugly the boys like that one. Let's go fellas.

Um yeah. I I think I think the biggest conversation that's not being had and the reason I'm sticking on this one is I know this will help all of you is are you good at your craft? Yep, you know, like do you understand what time to post how long the copy should be? What the fam thumbnail Mr B spends 150 000 on a thumbnail Mr B spends a hundred fifty thousand dollars per thumbnail on his YouTubes That would make me and all of you understand that a thumbnail matters. Most people here have no idea what their thumbnail is when they post whatever is defaulted right? So I would say for you too more on the craft, you're welcome. Thank you Hi guys! my name is Nick hello I was part of eruption five I was the addict who for 26 years and overcame that addiction two and a half years.

clean Now all right thank you I am so I post my journey on social media I feel I'm making an impact I'm still trying to get a handle on life and it's a journey. I'm learning. we all are. Yeah, yeah, and um, like I'm impacting people I'm starting to be consistent in the gym and I'm getting messages I'm consistency too.

This is amazing and and the thing is, I'm unemployed I'm just wondering. do you have any advice of how I can monetize what I'm doing or I mean monetize? You know, do you want to get a job? Yeah, but but that's this is me like I love I love posting my journey. but I'm asking you a really practical question because I want you to win. Monetizing is very challenging.

Let me explain. You've got to either get brand deals. You've got to either be a big enough Creator where you're getting meaningful money from the revenue share of the platforms, which you have to be at a very high level. For that, you have to create a product to sell.

All three of those are challenging. You could create a course or charge your audience I think that changes the entire Dynamic of it. So I think you have to be monetizing is challenging. The reason I'm asking is do you want to get a job I Think the same tenacity you're attacking this with applying to 10 or 15 jobs a day with good copy and good videos is something you also have to give a thought to.

Yeah, because I Think the stability of having the job nine to five and then do content afterwards might take the anxiety off because when you're unemployed, it's on your mind. Yeah, 100 and then you may. you might actually be sitting on some. It's very important I Want everybody to hear this? You might be sitting on something very powerful, but you have to keep doing it for another three years before it goes to where you want it to.

But if you're so anxious to turn it into money, you're going to lose your audience because they're going to feel it and all you needed to do was get a nine to five. Oh my. God Get that? Okay, yes I understand oh brother I Love oh I'm sorry sister I See you. Go ahead.

I didn't realize about the four I Apologize. Go ahead my man. That's all right. Uh, personally welcome to Melbourne We appreciate you.

Um uh, my name is Ryle I'm a CEO and found uh CEO and founder of a public company in the B2B space. Um, a couple questions. Firstly, tomorrow night my mum, my wife makes a great chicken soup do you want to come for? Shabbos Yeah so that's an incredible invite. but I don't know if you know this.

I'll be leaving at 4am on my way to Sydney and then to Brisbane back and uh in America on Sunday I'm uh, I'm on a tour out here. Well, we'll miss you at Shore but next time next time. Uh. Secondly, look, you put out a lot of content recently around personal around B2c.

Yes, we're in the B2B space. What are you seeing in the B2B space? what's the next play and I think it's really an untapped Market I Agree. What do you think? How so I think LinkedIn and I've mentioned it already twice. Think about that.

I'm obsessed with LinkedIn For B2B most of Vaynermedia's growth right now is in B2B clients because we are annihilating LinkedIn because LinkedIn is acting like Facebook 10 years ago. So to me LinkedIn for B2B is is a golden era right now. The media and the creative opportunities both on organic, region creative. but then targeting Cios or procurement like the ad targeting is insane.

It's like the that Facebook got yelled out for that. They still have so LinkedIn by far starting podcasts that are made for just a couple hundred people. Back to when I was asking that gentleman, do you really need scale if you're in B2B and you're only targeting 850 companies in all of Australia you only need 850 listeners and so a B2B podcast that you can do to then shop up so you have creative to run ads on LinkedIn Is that what? I'd be thinking about? What are you seeing from a trend point of view as well, product or service? What do you seeing over there in the states which sort of coming across your desk? I Just think the biggest trend is how AI is going to disrupt a lot of these products and services. you know? I Think from a product standpoint, the aiification of so many of these products is like that Warfare has begun.

Um, that's probably the biggest observation by far. Thank you thank you Yes, darling, thank you. I'll be quick with this one. Uh, my name is Chris I am an ADHD leadership coach Oh, I'm sorry she's going over there.

You're nice. I work with uh leaders who have ADHD autism, dyslexia, dyspraxia? Yes, yeah, yes. and you asked? you start talking about this idea of reverse engineering what people find valuable? Yes. and this is something that I am particularly trying to integrate into my life because I do have a knack for putting myself out in community building my ideas by bouncing them off other people.

Yes. I need the verbal process me too to do this me too, but then making sure that I'm pulling out the right question to ask from all that information that I'm learning. and then how do I answer that question in a way that's going to be um, really powerful for an audience. So how do I reverse engineer that by doing the Reps Meaning by giving out all those answers and all those hypotheses, the volume is the Breakthrough The reason stuff is very clear to me is because a lot of the work I do is public and you don't see it.

Meaning go look at every post I've posted. Analyze it like you can see over a course of like six months. Me get to the point through little steps on a daily basis. Like if you think about me being consistent, it's because it's small variations of saying the same thing in different context points until it hits the crescendo.

This is the whole concept of perfection that everyone's got confused. Even the way you're thinking about it right is like so powerful. I Think this could really liberate You by trying to get there over like notice how you're like I need to do it verbalizing. and I was like me too.

The only difference is I'm not trying to solve the problem for a perfect answer one time I'm doing it over and over through the content that is amazing and very helpful. Thank you! You're welcome Yes darling, go ahead hi Hi! I'm good. Thank you in 2019! I've been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis and I have affected eye moments and 40 disability. but the thing is um I still are happy I've done over a million dollar business in last five years and my complicators are my haters.

They hate me and you do understand you just said your competitors are your haters. They hate you right? Yes, you do understand the number one goal every business has is for their competitors to hate them. That is a tremendous accomplishment. My mother 's earlier uh, we a male dominating market and I think I have done good being a woman.

but now I'm angry because I have more than enough savings and I'm entering into B2B uh business I will be probably opening my own RTO by this year now I'll be the sole director and CEO of that business and now those uh who are right now hating me I'll be into the business. then those will be my perspective. Now the thing is how to I don't tell everyone that I have MS I don't want to take pity. uh you know.

Yep, um I I want to. Uh, just be positive. Yeah, um about that. they should take a positive uh like this like I I I'll be able to do the business.

how should I create a positive impact on them? Well, I think first of all, are you going to still be in the prior business or are you no So my husband he also helping me big time. he's there. um so um, he will be in the prior business and I will be in another business now so they're gonna hate him. It's just that because my eye moments are not good enough and my hearing uh, problem is there.

and because I promise obviously I yawn a lot and but I have wings I want to fly um as much as I can do I am doing it I am not a woman who can say title I'm just cook and clean I I Just want to do a lot of things in myself I'll be honest with you like if you if your next thing would was going to be would you invest in my business, the answer would be yes like you're so clearly motivated and capable like I'm almost embarrassed to answer your question because I don't think it's going to have any level of impact I Think you're gonna will your way to success in your next business I Mean it Like these prospective clients are either going to say yes or no. My intuition is if they all say no, you're going to take that feedback and come up with another thing that people are going to say yes to. Okay, right? Like that's what you do. You persevered through all of what you've persevered through like you're just capable of navigating it.

How do I You know how when you say how am I going to make it positive or how do I make it positive, you've already decided that and the fact that you're not going to be in that other business is probably going to be a benefit. Some of those people are going to be smart enough to do business with you just to try to learn from what you did in the last business. which is their business Yeah, my last business I I Just been following you and each and every video I see on Snapchat on Tick tock on Insta everywhere I follow you on Twitter as well. Um though very um the thing which has helped me a lot was like the one video of yours when you said um, you don't need big cameras, you don't need anything this Smartphone is more than enough that that like I I really love I I really got motivated enough and I am here because of you This is what I can say thank you thank you Larry how are you I'm well my friend a message on what's uh on Instagram I'm excited to see you.

it'll be glad if you can please reply me if you got it all right. Uh so what? I want to ask you see um I'm huge in women Obama uh I've been a chef for 22 years and because of my wife I quit the job and I actually did a full-time business from zero to six figure in six months. Amazing! And I come from a family of doctors my father's a spine surgeon, my mom's a Physio and while it was, uh, premium clients, you know the main thing which really really sort of got me curiosity what he said and I want to ask you for value clients were coming to me and they were having pain and they were going and I was so curious about it. why are they having this pain and then as I look at the competition so what I really found out I actually according to the same same Bowl I during covert actually injured my shoulder I injured my back and I spoke to my dad he couldn't really help me I spoke to my mom, she couldn't really help me so I went to the physios I went to the osteos and they gave me some Correctional exercise which did help but the main thing that's happened I lost my motivation of exercising again.

so I started finding a gap and the Gap would have really realized that. The main thing what people really come into the fitness is because they lack posture and because of kosher. when you're sitting down to doing any exercise no matter you go to the world best shape. if people won't really fix your posture they'll show that you're gonna get injured.

So what my the Gap I found is I started digging deep in started hiding the best coaches around the world and it came with a plan that I want to look after especially women because they're hard-working women and they all support their family to fix their posture before giving them a dream come true or give you six pack? Yeah, so what? I Really want to ask that when people come to me? First of all, they want to see the senior which is physios uh, all other places and I'm giving them a lot of value, right? They let them dictate their life and someday they come and question me. and I sometimes really really feel bad in my Integrity I probably saw so many things and sometimes I think I'm not able to add that value of all the patient hard work and actually working with the Curiosity going through depression anxiety during covert to get that piece of product which is meant for Vitality meant for being happy not going to the doctors I got it having a laundry life so I just wanted to help me. How can I get that value added to my business so that people really think they take everything for granted? Oh, you fix my leg. Oh that's said.

I'm gonna start walking. So I'm like what if five years or ten years later you are actually not able to walk? they don't really think about it. so I really want to sort of I found a gap and this is for mental health and I have people I've got this new way of exercising away. But what's the Gap that you're trying to fill for yourself? In this scenario, you feel underappreciated or under compensated? No, I'm actually trying to get that compassion.

What? I see in people a vision where five years at 10 years down the lane if they want to come to me and they were still going through the process like as a fitness coach I want to bring that together? Yes I understand, but why? Because I love doing that. But okay, so if you love doing it, you don't need the feedback loop for what you're asking for. No I just want to say how can you add value How can you make people you've you've added value, but sometimes people don't take it that way. That's because you're looking for that validation.

Okay, no that's true. but how can I overcome the valuation? And how can I break that process by by recognizing that a lot of times getting that validation comes later. It's all right. You've been doing it for six months.

Oh no, no training. I've been doing it for 17 years. Yes, my business started when I was actually left the job building code and six months I actually grew up my business. Yep and I was working.

so the business going on for 17 years got it? But full time I've been understood. Look I think I think what's very clear is and I get it is I Just think that the the the validation that you're seeking is just not. it's going to be as transactional as you'd like it to be. All right So I'll tell you one I Want to ask one Okay? Can I ask one question please? Real quick please real quick.

So when you said about the parents yes, like because they mean doctors yes and I came as a chef yes, there was a huge intimidation. Of course you can't be a doctor. Of course. please come to my father and say of course that you you're such a big doctor.

Yes, right? So how can I fix that? If you think that's a validation, just give me one answer. thank you. Why would you care about that? Let's talk about it. So your Dad's friend, your uncle, whoever it is, to your point I believe what you were saying I was going to end with that.

Knowing the history of doctors with a chef, you know when you were doing it, that was like the help you know a chef right? I Think that insecurity feeling is what's happening to you. With your need for validation from the patients, you're trying to prove something I get it like because that's a lot of judgment thrown at you coming up in your life of course I Think you got to let it go. It doesn't mean anything as if someone's opinion of you matters I Don't want to let a girl but still it just seeps inside me I Don't know why it seeps inside of you because you were dominated by it. You were pounded by it from your heritage.

That doctor Dr Chef you just you. That was a lot. That was a lot to be thrown at you. but you've got to release that.

You've got to release it. You got it. Hey Gary Well hey Gary Um, my core mission is to harness the cognitive potential of humanity. My name is Justin I'm an AI coach and I help CEOs and executive leaders Elevate to their cognitive potential by using AI One of the joys I have at the moment is working with the leadership team of a school.

Okay, you mentioned some comments about, you know School marks and and clearly not reflective of smarts. The schools that we went through were designed in one way. like if you got to redesign a school today that was more suitable to you with everything you know about AI with everything you know about what you need, students coming in like what are you putting in a school of the future that you're building. you know for me, if I'm thinking about creating a curriculum, the concept of information memorization is ludicrous.

Asking kids to memorize stuff for tests is silly when we have technology where it is today for me. I would try to build a school that was building self-esteem and was teaching kids how to interact and was teaching kids practical things like real rules of society like competition and Merit how to pay your taxes like what life insurance means. It would be completely based on common sense and kindness. Of course, like when people like know Gary you don't get it.

You have to teach core skills I'm like do you know any people are homeschooled and learned at home like you can t like Core skills are pick up on a ball like they're there. They're always there. like yeah, okay, you'll teach math but like I Just think that we don't think about positioning people for real life. That's all.

Academia for the sake of Academia Yeah, we had this cool opportunity to personalize the learning right. So like, is there a class? Is there a something you'd love to go back and do differently? All of it I Hated school. You know, like like the fact that I wasn't taught like about marketing or or like you know, proper investing or just normal. Like it's just it's crazy.

we teach no life skills and and to the parents that are worried about privacy of AI data. Do you think that's a thing that we're just going to shift our mindset around that every single person in this room's privacy and data has been compromised already? Yeah, it has. Let's listen, Nobody wants their date data or privacy compromise. But it's already happened.

Like every government's been hacked. Every organization, all your banks have been had like it's all there. I know what you're doing tonight? Yeah, thank you thank you. Hi hi um my name is Forsha and this is my mom Rebecca and I was wondering how I could convince my mom to let me have some social media platforms so I could so I could like show my dancing and acting and stuff well I think look look I think that's a decision between you and your mom I that I have no interest in getting involved in but I would say to your mom there is a way to it's like look, this is a philosophical thing for parents forever.

We for a lot of us in this room that our parents now what's going on with social media reminds me so much around alcohol right? So alcohol in America We banned alcohol in the 30s and 40s. Just like some people ask us to ban social media today, what it did was it created a byproduct of even worse. Behavior people were still doing it anyway and our relationship with alcohol has never been great in our country. For that reason, a lot of parents here know because we went to University and college with kids that parents were very very strict and made everything demonized and the first week of college they got blackout drunk every night because they didn't know how to balance it.

So I think today social media has that stigma for parents and I think for a lot of parents there is ways to do it in a way that can be a little bit of moderation at a time. Sometimes you can start with only the family members are able to follow the kid and things of that nature. So I think you and your mom have to have a second level conversation. You got to convince her mom it's not all or nothing.

it's not like I want to go on Tick Tock and go crazy and you can't watch. Maybe you can make it a private account and maybe only you mom can decide who gets to follow me and get to see my stuff. And maybe you start going a little bit one step at a time. I Think too many kids and parents have the All or Nothing approach without having maybe a slow and steady approach.

Thank you! Um, hi, Gary hi Rebecca I've been following you for a very long time. I work in the mental health space just recently and specialize in children. Uh, teenagers mainly yes and Porsche is 12 turning 13. Yes, and so many kids that I've seen already have got huge addictions to gaming.

Yeah, um, social media online? You know, watching gaming and their parents want me to help them with their mental health? Yeah, but they're spending four or five hours a day online. so that's why. for me, it's really difficult for me. I Get it? I Get it to say here you go here's Tick Tock when I know what the algorithms do for you know, the undeveloped brain? Yeah, but just to just to put it into a different perspective.

when I was you know, 14 a little bit older? you know everybody was mad at models and magazines because they were so skinny and all the girls in my high school were in the bathroom throwing up because they all thought they had to be. Kate Moss because we looked at magazines when I was in high school, everyone was talking about people playing Nintendo for four hours a day or what. or the TV was the problem. Humans are always going to be addicted to something.

Yeah, because you know, like I think I think And by the way, you know this for every kid that you see and what you do for a living, there's another kid who is handling it, you know. And so I think parents just love their kids so much that they this generation of parents you and I included is driven by fear at a level that we have not seen in parenting in a very long time and and that fear is making us do things that are very different. All of us that are in our 40s and above also had another thing our parents want weren't up our ass every minute like we are with our kids. A lot less claps for that one.

So I think we've got a double issue at hand. We have the most fear-based parenting generation of all time and we have parents that are in our kids business at a level that is unheard of. So we've become micromanaging, fear-based mongers and our children are actually having counter effects to this. We think we're doing good.

We're so up their ass they don't know how to be grown-ups by the time they're talking I'm not grilling you I'm not killing you I'm gonna get home. she's gonna be like I told you you know look I think the scariest thing on Earth is to tell anyone how to parent their child I Think it's completely out of bounds I Will say that this has been going on for a while. I Also have the luxury of interacting with an ungodly amount of people and a lot of them are now 18, 20, and 22 and many hundreds of them work for me and many more. Ten thousands of them talk to me and I can tell you that we've got to let these kids breathe a little bit.

Just a little bit. We are so far up their ass. Most of us are strong because we were out in the jungle a little bit. What we're doing in modern parenting is we're creating zoo animals.

We're putting them in these cages and we're trying to take care of them. And I don't know if you know what happens to an animal that grew up in the zoo. When they put them in the wild, they die within a minute because they go out to the real jungle and the lion tears their head off. and so what I think is happening is that we are micromanaging and zoo animal mingling our kids so much out of fear because we love them so much and we know what they're doing every second that we're actually not preparing them for life.

and I think like the old saying in Russian that is my favorite Russian saying it translates to everything is at its best when there is balance and I think we've lost our Collective balance hey Gary um my name is Samson and uh um it's good to see you. You changed my life so thank you. um seven years ago I uh it's the first time I know about your content and then I'll say one of those kids who's always been learning and never you know doing anything and then I was in a very um I was in a job kind of suffering a lot and then um so five years ago I read crush it and then that kind of demonstrated to me um how like people who have who are successful or have a little bit of success needed you know how much work you needed to get there it kind of you know gave me that Awakening and then I I quit my job and then I find something that actually maps to um where I wanted to go. Yes and um two years ago I get into a digital marketing agency a mid-size of um advertising agency in Australia and I'm very happy um from there and um I'm loving it I'm not selling my crafts every day so I just really want to say um thank you thank you um yeah, um for me I know um because I love you so much in the future in the future not right now um I really want to kind of work for you or have been here so email me at because we're hot, we're exploding in Australia and so we're hiring I Was gonna ask what kind of tips You're Gonna Give You know people around like you just gave me like it's direct.

it's okay. What'd I do hi Gary hello hi hi Gary hi it's um such. you're such an inspiration to me. I've been following you um for so many years as well.

um I was cautious age when I arrived on a boat um as a refugee from northern Iraq um the Kyrgyzstan region if you if you know of course um and then um, obviously as a person from that sort of background. I've been through a lot but I never made an excuse to uh, give up on my dreams and so on and so forth as everyone else is so inspiring here. But um, honestly I started reading on self-development um a long, long time ago when I couldn't even speak English properly. um but um I think the most convincing person and also after having read your book, especially the chapter about conviction, um, it really made me.

It was like a punch in the face. It's I I Quit Law Actually two years ago when I was pregnant with my second child, there are there were a few pregnant people while they were listening to you I thought she was telling my story honestly like um, the beautiful lady in the pink from America Um, so when I was pregnant, I was um I don't know if anyone knows Lendlies. Maybe I shouldn't give out my previous employment history, but I was working for them not as a lawyer, but as an admin assistant to make my life easier while I was pregnant so that I don't have as much stress as a lawyer? Yes, strategically. I remember walking along the Uh I don't even know the name of the roof, but in the city um I was listening to your podcast every single day while I had a different mindset at work and then outside I was pumped every single day walking to exercise to make my child healthy and then I said you know what effort I'm gonna quit I will not go back to law I will never go back to Business Development management and so on.

and then I started creating Nfts which I had absolutely or no idea about it. So I started creating Nfds and I only sold two. But that's not the point. two.

is better than zero exactly. And then I started making uh, reconnecting with my childhood love of drawing. Um, but of course, to the disappointment of my parents, my mom was like, oh, my daughter does these days is draw and she went from law and human rights, lawyer and all the education you can imagine. you know when you become a lawyer and then I did a master of International relations and then I'm doing absolutely nothing with it.

other than that, it's um, just you know, a stepping stone and maybe use it as a strategy that I've that I have those things on my resume but isn't that interesting? Um, that? I sorry I'm fascinating myself I guess sorry I don't know how where that came from. but um, what I'm trying to say is um, I disappointed my parents and um, and I'm obviously not proud of that. But I for the first Yes, the number one thing that most people on Earth should be doing is disappointing their parents. did you hear that? And I I mean this.

Here's why: Yes, deep down, especially immigrant parents like we all, we all know the story. Deep down, push comes to shove. Maybe not to your face, but as a parent yourself, the number one thing a parent wants is their child to be happy. Yes, it is very obvious how parents get into this trap because we've lived through just like maybe our generation Is micromanaging too much.

Our parents generation and their parents generation valued the neighbor's opinion too much. Yes, most parents of the last two generations push their children to do things literally based on other people's opinions, not even their own opinion about their own child. 100 You should have disappointed your parents I should have done it way earlier. That is disappointing.

Um I bet you know now that I'm 35 and you know it's funny because when you have kids and I've had this from a lot of people. um once you have kids and it was so funny hearing it from me when you said your father was only paying you 70k a year and then you realize much later like oh gosh, like what he's not paying me at all. So I should speak up. Um so it's sometimes it requires uh, some time of course and you know, like of course, all done.

but then one day you're like okay, that's it. That's right, I'm gonna follow my own that's right path because I've you know time and by the way, a lot of people get upset with me. They're like Gary why are you saying this and I say to the parents I'm trying to save you I'm like the quicker your kid disappoints you, the more likely you'll have a long-term relationship with your kid. What people don't realize is people that Lit kids that live their lives for their parents start to build resentment for their parents as every day goes by and the longer they continue to live their lives for their parents, the more likely they're going to have a poor relationship with their parents.

and it's evident, evidenced by the relationship I'm having with my parents. Um, unfortunately because they're not understanding the path I'm taking which is now I'm about to go live with my product I'm not here commercializing that, but I'm just so proud of myself despite the backlash and the um, you know, the the sort of you know, the whatever um, they've given me I basically feel like I'm on my own On My Own Worst Even though the supporters can I get can I give you good news, they're going to get over it. Yeah, I reckon I have a really good idea Yes. Go to a store that does custom shirts? Yes! and I want you to make a shirt for your parents that says draw Over Law and I want you to give it to them? Yes, Right to their face? Absolutely yes.

I Thank you from the boys I wish you better than your heart desires. Thank you thank you. We'll go over a little bit. Hey Gary you're next Hi hey brother Um so I can't hold you yes I know who you are, how you doing man? um yeah, it rapidly.

It's the third continent we've seen each other on this year. Pretty cool. Yeah, very very pleased. Very fortunate.

Um so uh. last time we spoke in VidCon um I mentioned the Tokyo dads podcast that I'm working on. Yep, still is driving towards episode 55 to throw my standard bike I was scared you're already there and there was going to be time. Oh yeah.

um so today I want to dive into parenting? Okay, a little bit sort of one thing and you've mentioned many times specific instances that your parents have done certain actions. Yes, I Have you know remember like your dad's handshake? yeah I'm pleasing you when you? yeah. Now what are some things that you do specifically? um in practice with your children to install these things I I do very similar things. So what he's referring to for the people that really deep in my contact talk about these singular moments where I got positive reinforcement.

uh my mom. Oh the thing I think a lot about with parenting is like if you tell your kids it's all about Straight A's they get formed into like believing and listening to the system and they just become workers or listen blindly. Or if you over praise your children their whole lives for being beautiful, they become insecure as they get older because their validation sits in their looks or their athletic ability or their school. So I think a big thing for all leaders here, whether for parents or your employees, is what are you praising and validating? And so for me I follow a very similar blueprint you know with my with my son he's got a lot of empathy.

He's got a lot of feelings towards his friends, you know? um I Think about this one game he had in baseball where he hit a line drive and it hit the coach in the chest. He nailed it, was a great hit, hit the book and instead of running to the base he stopped and went and checked on the coach. and I continue to bring that up to him literally every other week that he had more compassion to see if the coach was good than his own selfish needs or excitement to succeed in the sport he was playing with my with my daughter. I Think about things about like when I see that she's not putting too much pressure on herself, you're basically watching and you're thinking about what validation systems you can do on things that are going to benefit them based on their personalities.

Um, back to the reverse engineering we talked about earlier. so you know. look I think I think if you love yourself and you're good to other people, your life will always be good. There's unlimited people on Earth who are deeply happy making forty six thousand dollars a year in annual income.

They exist at Scale and so I think we put so much time and effort into so many other things and you know for me, I'm spending all my time trying to make sure that they're just happy actually. and it starts with you know, reinforcing nice behavior either for others, think about the first story I told you or to oneself think about the Second Story last one or two questions hello Gary Hey Brother um so my name is Mark um I'm 22 years old firstly I am vlogging this so can you say hi to my Vlog because they told me I wouldn't be able to say hi to you Vlog What's good? Thank you Gary and thank you for tweeting back at the Best Day Of My Life um so I've been watching your content for a while and I love everything you talk about, patience, gratitude and execution and I live by it. I'm 22 and I taste test everything and I lead into curiosity. My problem is with patience and it's not because I want a million dollars and it's not because I want to make it, it's because um, this Monday I'm going to be re-watching my dad's business.

Okay I found I Love social media whether it's like advertising or being an influencer or things like that. and I'm relaunching my dad's business and I'm happy to be patient and do it patiently. but um like I don't understand how to be patient with my family healthy deteriorating Sure right? like I have a deep love for my parents I didn't give a how much money I make I really want to make it for my parents I I Really don't care like we've been renting for so long. All I want to do is make it for them I don't care about the money for myself.

How do I lead into patience? This is a very brother. This is a very common question because I talk about patients a lot And this framework I get a lot of questions about like Gary that's fine and dandy. but my mom is terminally ill and she's going to be gone in less than two years for sure and you can't tell me patience I have to make it before she goes and I say to that person this is incredibly challenging I'm so sorry this is the worst I'm devastated. but you being impatient and taking shortcuts is not going to create the thing you want anyway.

Okay, I'm giving you the answer to the following as their health deteriorates So what do you like? talk it through logically for me, building anything meaningful takes time. Yeah, so what are you going to do differently? Like like what's gonna happen? Do you think there's a shortcut? you think I'm going to tell you some trick You think I'm going to give you a tidbit that like it's just not how it works. it's just like you know I I like I know you talk about You know you gave up your 20s to like live out your dreams and stuff like that. I've done I've done the same.

No, you haven't No, you haven't. You haven't Not so low right? like what? But you didn't give up. You just said I've given up my 20s or 22. You haven't started.

Lean inside. That's good I lead into doing things that I enjoy. Rather than like going for things that have instant gratification, what you just said, you lean into things that you enjoy like that make me happy. Well then you didn't give up.

Sounds like sounds like you're being selfish. You're giving up going out things like that but you don't like that anyway. you like this more. so what the did you give up? I guess Okay, so thank you thank you.

But but this but I want to help you here. This is why we're doing this. You didn't give it up. Yeah, so keep going.

Yeah so I guess just for me. like I watch your content and I actually act on it. Okay, patience, gratitude, execution all the time. How do we overcome this issue of patience when there's like you know things that just can't be changed.

Do you recommend taking shortcuts? Do you recommend taking a faster route like you watch my content and think I'm gonna tell you to take a shortcut? Big question I have What? What's the shortcut? Talk this through because it's very, very like shortcut. Like What? What Do you? What's the business? Yeah, he's a show. He's a chauffeur business. Okay, so what shortcut are you gonna take to make this show for a business 10 times bigger to make it before their health deteriorates.

Clickbait stuff. What's that clickbait style? So do that. Yeah, Yeah. I Guess what's clickbait stuff? I Don't know? Like um I don't know? like I think Shady Marketing Strats.

You know that like what? I can't think of them on the spot because I try to be genuine when I Market But like, what? What do you think's gonna happen? What's Shady You're not doing a click funnel and a mastermind? Sure. So what's Shady What are you gonna like? Trick someone to take the cap like what? Are You Gonna Knock on people's door and throw them in the car and drive and then tell them they owe you 30 bucks. The are you good about? wait? like I I What? Why I'm doing this with you is you're talking philosophy. The biggest issue that so many people have is they talk about things in theory versus reality.

If you just listen to this conference, I'm doing this for everyone here. like what are you gonna do like you just we're gonna try my best. yeah but like you know which is amazing like I look I you're coming from a good place. you'd like this for them.

but like I Just also don't think you have an answer to the shortcut, right? So you have no other choice. Yeah, so what are you gonna do when you start for your dad's business? What's the plan? Um, well, he's had it for a while. honestly. I Love these guys.

but um, it hasn't been profitable for a while. Yep. so I'm re-watching it. Um, you know I'm going to be doing the advertising for I'm going to try manage these finances and I really want to just like from his business.

You know, like just by stopping just by cutting costs? Yeah, and making it not not profitable? Yeah, you've already advanced it dramatically. That's right. Yeah, that's not a shortcut. Yeah, that's working a P L properly.

Thank you Gary you're welcome and um, you said if you don't ask, you'll never know. So would I ever be able to get you on my podcast which is about finding gratitude and happiness? You know? One thing that I said up there is I'm working more on my Candor and so listen I'm working on it too. like no years ago. 10 years ago I would sit here and be like yes and everybody would clap and then like there'd be an 80 chance I wouldn't do it right and I don't want to be that person.

The answer is maybe okay if you email me and in the title put I was the kid that was looking for the shortcut. you know, maybe we'll sneak it in the clickbait thumbnail anyway? I Love you back ladies and Gentlemen Diamonds! Thank you thank you Foreign.